PTSD Survivor Poetry: Everyday is Memorial Day

In celebration of National Poetry Month and with Memorial Day around the corner, this week’s PTSD poem comes from …Kerry “Doc” Pardue.  Kerry wrote: I suffered for almost 40 years before the VA would assist me.  They kept telling me [there was] nothing that they could do to assist me.  I went to them in 1972 & 1984 and I was told they could not help me in any way, so I went away.  In 2002, I had a serious leg infection and was admitted to the VA and had a flashback when the guy in the bed next to me died.  They called up mental health and was put into a counseling program for Vietnam Vets for 40 weeks with individual and group sessions.  I then applied for disability for PTSD and was diagnosed as 100% service connected disabled. Guest Post by: Kerry “Doc” Pardue Today we remember A grateful Nation recalls Our Men and Women Who paid the price Of freedom for us all For those of us who Served beside them Every day is Memorial Day We can’t let their memories fade We were touched by their loss Their lives touched ours Changing and helping us Becoming who we are Grateful for what we have Freedom at Home For those left at home You gave us your sons and daughters Husbands and Wives Fathers and Mothers Brothers and Sisters Friends and Lovers Thank you for sharing them with us We miss them all We won’t let them be forgot That is why each of us Who have been in battle knows We can never ever forget That...
PTSD Survivor Poetry: Darkness

PTSD Survivor Poetry: Darkness

In celebration of National Poetry Month, this week’s PTSD poem comes from …Sabine M. Pitcher.  Sabine wrote: I have written poems on and off ever since I can remember – since I was proficient enough in English (which is my second language). Some of my poems reflect my own feelings – but, more often, they start off with something I hear or read or somebody tells me. On a voluntary basis, I work with people who leave the UK Armed Forces, many of them former officers – so that’s an area I feel particularly close to and which is reflected in my poems: they are about loss, dying, loneliness, making difficult decisions. And, about living with the memories of it. I wrote one  poem after a brief chat with a Vietnam veteran. He said that it made his wife cry, and his daughter said “I understand now …”. That’s why I write. Darkness By: Sabine M. Pitcher In the middle of the night you’re suddenly awake. Was there a sound? Was there a light? You cannot say. You feel something rise inside you. Slowly, very slowly. You feel trapped. You cannot breathe. Your eyes accustom to the dark, but nothing stops the darkness that takes over your inside. There is no way you stay in bed. You’re restless now, try to escape, but you can’t run. You hear the sounds inside your head, the volume lowers in the light. But now it’s dark. I try to tell you, you are not alone. Please let me help, please don’t push me away. You turn around, you’re shaking now. I fight back tears. Tonight you need my strength....

PTSD Survivor Poetry: It’s Raining Again

In celebration of National Poetry Month, this week’s PTSD poem comes from …Martin Lauri. Martin has published a book of powerful poems entitled “Bipolar Soldier.”   The Bipolar Soldier’ is a true story of just one man with a diagnosis of Bipolar disorder, and the life that caused it. This short book is a mixed collection of verse written by Martin Lauri over just ten days. It gives some stark insight into the life and mind of a person with Bipolar Disorder. It is also the prelude to his debut novel of the same name, which he is compiling, on good days. Martin Lauri is the Bipolar Soldier. Its Raining Again Guest Post by: Martin Lauri It’s raining again outside today. Inclement, is how bad I feel. Gloomy and sad, hopeless and lost, The pain inside feels so real. I tried to be helpful, Oh God how I tried. And then in an instant You just pass by my side. You undermine every little thing that I do, Sometimes I breath such hatred for you. I hate all the shouting it hurts so bad, I hate all the silence it drives me mad. I thought in an instant about a train Then I’d be gone,no more pain. I thought about ending it, letters too About the kind of things I’d say to you. On the day that I left you And my children so sad, To hell with this life I’m off cause I’m mad. I wasn’t always so sad, so lonely, not there. Sometimes I hate it, not a soul to care. I can hardly see my words, I write through the glaze, As...
PTSD Survivor Poetry by Grasshopper Stephanie

PTSD Survivor Poetry by Grasshopper Stephanie

Wrapping up our celebration of National Poetry Month, this week’s PTSD poem comes from Grasshopper Stephanie, author of  the guest post, On Being A Survivor. You Were Wrong About Me and One Day, I Will Truly Believe It  by Grasshopper Stephanie To my abuser – You were sneaky and took what you wanted. i was no one to you……an object. You thought it didn’t matter because i was just a quiet, good, little girl. You were wrong. You hid what you could be to others around you. You showed me your side you carefully hid. You thought it didn’t matter because i was just a quiet, good, little girl. You were wrong. You touched me where you were never supposed to. You stole something precious from me i have badly needed! You thought it didn’t matter because i was just a quiet, good, little girl. You were wrong. You cared only for you own pleasure that morning At such an unexpected opportunity for yourself. You thought it didn’t matter because i was just a quiet, good, little girl. You were wrong. You may have believed i would not understand and would forget. That i would think it was only “playing.” You thought it didn’t matter because i was just a quiet, good, little girl. You were wrong. You scared me with your mean and silencing looks, Betting on my obedient, fearful nature. You thought it didn’t matter because i was just a quiet, good, little girl. You were wrong. You may have thought that i would always be the quiet, good, and scared, little girl Who would never tell a soul,...
PTSD Survivor Poetry: ‘Depths of My Heart’

PTSD Survivor Poetry: ‘Depths of My Heart’

In our ongoing celebration of National Poetry Month, this week’s PTSD poem comes from Denise Boyd… Depths of My Heart By Denise Boyd What do I see in the depths of my heart? But a child so pure, innocent and set apart, Apart from the filth and innocence robbed, Apart from the trusting hands that cradled her soul, Took her aside and stole what was not theirs. Apart from lies and deep secrets untold, fears of the childhood nightmares continue to unfold. Open the window and depart I say Free the bird out of her cage Give her air, she can’t breathe, she suffocates from her childhood dreams. My name is Denise Boyd, I am a Mother, a Wife and a childhood sexual abuse and rape survivor.  I have overcome many obstacles throughout my teenage years, including becoming a single mother at age 19; but those experiences do not define me, they are the experiences that have helped to mold me into the Woman that I am today. I choose to believe that I am a triumphant overcomer and with that, I Thank God for the opportunity to encourage others, not to give up and to demand freedom from their past. I believe it is important for us to TELL OUR STORY so that we can help one another. Why use the name bnewvision? Because I believe that I am on a Healing Journey that will encourage others to “B” about a New Vision for their life. Please follow my Blog at http://bnewvision.wordpress.com, where I speak candidly about my childhood abuse experiences and share my poetry. Twitter:@bnewvision Denise Boyd ~...