Making the Shift: What does healing mean to you?
Monday, May 3rd, 2010 • PTSD Recovery Tips •
Achieving anything means knowing exactly what you want. When it comes to healing PTSD, are you clear on what you desire?
In the fog of PTSD it’s only natural that you may not stop to think about what, exactly, you’re trying to do. (Hint: “I want to feel better” isn’t specific enough!)
But think back to other things you’ve wanted in the past. A car, an outfit, a piece of jewelry, a vacation, a promotion – in each of those things I’ll bet you were very specific about what you were working toward. I bet from the very beginning you knew what color car, what type of outfit, what kind of gem, what destination or what title you wanted to have.
The same needs to be done in healing PTSD. We’re all walking this recovery path together, but we have individual ideas, perceptions, goals and plans. It’s up to each of us to get specific in our own minds.
For myself, I knew from the day of my diagnosis that by the end of that hell I wanted to be completely symptom-free. Since then, however, I’ve talked with other survivors for whom that definition was not their expected PTSD healing outcome. They wanted the nightmares to end, or the hypervigilance to subside or to end substance abuse. What do you want?
Part of making the shift from powerless to powerful is gaining clarity. This week, try this:
Write across the top of a sheet of paper, By the time I’m finished healing I want…
Now, finish that sentence. Be as clear and specific as you can be. The more details you use the more focus you’ll get, the more you’ll know what you’re aiming for and be able to plan and strategize how to get it.
There are a few ways you can go about doing this exercise:
1 – Sit down and write as much as you can think of in a free flow — don’t worry about spelling, punctuation, grammar, etc. Just write. Let your mind wander. When it gets stuck, simply write the beginning of the sentence over and over until something new occurs to you. This exercise is meant to come from your right brain, your creative side, which means the thoughts can go in any direction, in any order. Let yourself feel free to dream, fantasize and imagine.
2 – Maybe you don’t like to write, maybe you’re more of a list person. Fabulous; no sweat. Make a list. Let your mind spew out everything that’s on the top of it. And then dig for more. Each day, add something else to the list.
In both of the options, follow through more than once. Part of becoming more powerful is retraining your brain to function powerfully. It will take some practice! Always, your mind will automatically give you what’s on the surface, but the really meaningful stuff is usually buried just below that.
As the days pass and your subconscious mind continues to mull the question, give it an opportunity to show you what you’re really hoping to accomplish. Feel free to share parts of your writing or your list in the comments!
(Photo acknowledgement on Flickr.)
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Michele,
I have to weigh in on this issue, because it becomes a major focus in my coaching practice, as well. You have framed this subject beautifully and I must participate.
Healing by its very nature is restoring function to some part of our being that is damaged or injured. Healing most often involves 2 parties; a healer and one who is wounded. Some of us heal alone, but the road we chose is usually one travelled before, so we are never alone when we heal. Together the two formulate a plan of action to best bring about resolution, but it is the responsibility of the wounded to “own the healing process.”
So healing, to me, is begins when we embrace the power that we can reach a state of resolution and we release all the reasons that we cannot. With this mindset, you can never have failure…only results! If you don’t like your results then adapt or change your healing method…but own that method first!
Keep the light shining. You do such great work!
All the best,
Beau
Ive taken a diferent approach. I’m sitting on the bottom of the sea of my life. I am so low I have to look up to see down. Above me are my personal sharks. Each one wants to devour me. Each one represents all the events of my life that brought me to this point. I want to swim up through the sharks but first I have to be in the right frame of mind. I have carefully labeled each shark and have to plan a strategy to get past each one. This is how I see my life with PTSD. It is a life and death struggle and I chose to live. I will not end up being that that sea captains call their deck hands. I just recently hit bottom and I was looking up to see down. I now know that my recovery will take careful planning each step of the way “Careful Planning”.
@ Beau — Feel free to share your thoughts any time! Tell us more about how you help clients to “reach a state of resolution and … release all the reasons that [they] cannot”. (Yes, I know that would be a long explanation, but what’s the short version?)